A changed heart...

“It takes a big heart to do what you do.” 

I smile…hesitate…somewhat awkwardly trying to formulate a genuine response.  “What I should have said” didn’t hit me until I was westbound, 20,000 feet in the air en route home.

While I’ve never actually physically seen my heart, I’m pretty sure it’s just regular sized, proportionate to my body.  But of course I realized he wasn't accusing my heart of exceeding the fist guideline we were all given in grade school...but a 'thank you' didn't resonate so I opted for the awkward smile in response...because it felt more honest.  

My heart really isn't big...it's changed.  [what i should have said]

I’d imagine that Christ had to make quite an impact on earth to live a life worthy of marking time.   

BC = Before Christ

AD = Anno Domini or Year of the Lord referring to the year of Christ’s birth

I’d also imagine that Christ should make a strikingly similar impact on our individual lives when we authentically come to Him.

Sometimes I find myself referring to my own life in those terms, telling a story and clarifying 'before Christ' because in some stories...it makes all the difference.

Before Christ...

• My identity was wrapped up in the world, dependent on my accomplishments and attention from others. 
• I didn't think about serving the poor or feeding the hungry - I thought a lot about me.
• I threw away a marriage.
• I swam [ok nearly drowned] in the deep end of certain pools of sin trying to fill the void in my heart.
• I held grudges, fostered bitterness.

Anno Domini...

• My identity is rooted in Him. 
• My heart breaks for the least of these.
• I've been forgiven.
• I've been set free.
• I forgive.
  

So while you may see a big heart - I know better...

He changed me.

I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh.  Ezekiel 36:26

 

Brothers and sisters, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. God chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things—and the things that are not—to nullify the things that are, so that no one may boast before him. It is because of him that you are in Christ Jesus, who has become for us wisdom from God—that is, our righteousness, holiness and redemption. Therefore, as it is written: “Let the one who boasts boast in the Lord.” 1 Corinthians 1:26-31

  

Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. Philippians 3:12-14